Thursday, March 09, 2006

A little tirade on personal responsibility...

A national men's rights group plans to file a federal lawsuit this morning in U.S. District Court in Detroit, claiming that fathers have the legal right to opt out of the financial responsibilities of supporting a child they didn't want -- in a claim they dub "Roe v. Wade Â… for Men.",


that's right folks... more of our amazing society trying to duck out of responsibility reciting the famous phrases my 5-year-old recites to me...

"It's not my fault."

I'm really sorry buddy, you may be 25 years old... have your whole life ahead of you... a budding career... perhaps just graduated from college... but shut the hell up. You, just by entering into this debate shows you are a spineless jackass. Call me old fashioned, but MY father told me if I wasn't ready for the responsibility of having a child, DON'T HAVE SEX. I learend from this sage advice, and had two children when I was old enough and responsible enough to handle it. You're wanting to dodge the responsibility of bringing a child into this world is the same asshat logic that brought us people suing lawn mower companies for dropping them on thier feet when they trimmed the bushes with them. NEXT TIME you think about putting your pathetic lil tool in a woman, maybe you had better think out the LONG TERM, as opposed to the SHORT TERM implications. I think I'm going to start a new non-profit group, the Coalition to Stop Stupid People. We will be armed with bats, and ALOT of attitude. When I say "stupid should be painful" I'll mean it. Welcome to the club Matt Dubay. I've got a Louisville Slugger with your name on it.

Friday, March 03, 2006

Nothing But Monkey Business

Congratulations to the Detroit City Council. Once again this esteemed body has managed to completely play partisan politics, using tools such as bigotry and racism as tools for division, and done a great job of all but shuttering the Detroit Zoo. The Zoo itself has been around forever, and was a gift to the city by a bunch of amazing philanthropists. In it's time of being run by the city, Its had its license to buy or breed more animals revoked on a couple occasions, and nearly shuttered because of its poor conditions for the animals. SO, lets step back a couple months, where our Mayor cuts off funding for the Zoo's operations to the tune of a few million dollars. The city counsel was supposed to vote into action language for a state grant to carry the zoo into next year when it could begin some capital campaigns and such to take over economic responsibility. Well, due to the bickering, back-biting, and lack of action by the city council, the deadline for applying for the millions passed. Now, without an emergency bill sent through the Michigan house and senate, we may lose our beloved zoo.

WTF? Columbus has a zoo. Even Toledo has a zoo (which kick's the one in Detroit's ass). Losing this landmark and haven for childhood stories will put our region in the ranks of the Flint's of the world. I give up.

Thank you Detroit City Council. It really is too bad we suburbanites can't run in your city, and due to your idiocy, we, and our children will suffer.

Oh, and Coleman Young Jr. (the illegitimate son of the nefarious mayor) is running for the Michigan House. Please readers, pray for us.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

It's Hamas... Not Hummus...

Why is it people are so f--king stupid? Hmmm. Things in the Holy Land are about to take a turn! Hamas is large and in-charge! President Bush has to be sitting at his desk asking himself "What the hell was I thinking?" Give a downtrodden people in the middle east a little land, ALOT of financial aid, install a democratic election process, and watch one of your WORST ENEMIES get installed as the new government. NOW THAT'S DEMOCRACY! From the people that brought you Abu Abbas and the Achille Lauro fiasco, and Ibrahim Al-Makadmah whos responsible for the deaths of countless Israeli soldiers, Aziz Abdel Rantisi organizer of hundreds of deaths during one of the Intifada's... Comes a NEW PARLIAMENT! Woo! Hoo!

One can only hope that at their swearing in ceremonies they conclude with the ritualistic "blowing themselves up for Allah" they are now famous for. I can see it now... Military reform, Terrorist camps... Education reform, children's bomb-building classes... Political reform, "now that we have part of Israel, let's go for the whole thing."

Lord have mercy on anyone living at ground zero.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Who the F**K is Marinelli?

Vietnam veteran, Buccaneers Assistant Head Coach, Toughest Guy in Football... BLAH. BLAH. BLAH. I think Matt Millen just sealed his coffin by hiring Rod Marinelli. Probably a nice guy, a wonderful family man, but JESUS. The Lions need a proven LEADER and WINNER to turn the fortunes of this very misguided team around. NOW, I'm also hearing that we are going to give away our first round pick this year to get Chris Simms from Tampa Bay to be another yet "untried commodity" to turn our team on a winning path. It all makes me wanna move to Pittsburgh, or Indianapolis, SOMEWHERE they GET IT. Indy wanted to win... the hired a proven winner on Tony Dungee... Kansas City wanted to win, so they hired Herm Edwards... The Red Wings want to win, they hire Mike Babcock. The Pistons want to win, they hire Flip Saunders. THE LIONS want to win, so they hire some guy with NO RECENT HEAD COACHING EXPERIENCE. Hell, Jimmy Johnson is out there (although I doubt he would EVER want to work for the Lions). Gary Moeller is out there and to date has the WINNINGEST record of all Lions coaches since Wayne Fontes. DITKA is out there (need I say more). Today I curse Matt Millen with the bites from a thousand fleas. Damn. I really thought he would get this one right. I really hope I am wrong, but unfortunately, I have history on my side... REMEMBER THE MORNHINWEG!

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Chocolate City

I swear if I made a racist, asshat statement like saying "I wish we could create 'whitey' city," I'd have Louis Farrakhan, Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton piled onto my front lawn faster than you could say "ACLU Lawsuit." What the hell was Ray Nagin thinking? I know he was all excited about talking to a preacher previous to the speech, but DAMN. Lets go ahead Ray, and alienate a huge population from coming down to Mardi Gras... an event that brings your city $220,532,132. Sheesh. I have a prize for you Ray... You get "idiot of the week"... hands down.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

GM's Lutz: Don't cut exec pay

When there is an excuse for everything, GM's chief boner Bob Lutz (when asked about Kirk Kerkorian/Jerry York's proposal to cut EVERY GM executive and line worker's paycheck) said

"The capability of successfully trying to turn around an unsuccessful automobile company is a very rare and highly sought after skill set. And you do the shareholder no good whatsoever by reducing compensation to the point where everybody leaves."

WOW. I swear if any of my clients saw an overall decrease in marketshare and sales, and tanked their stock, they would fire me on the spot. OK.. OK... I know GM has a plan.. and here it is...

GM is cutting 30,000 hourly jobs across 12 U.S. facilities by 2008, shaving $1 billion from its nearly $6 billion annual health care tab through a deal with the United Auto Workers, and has lowered prices on most U.S. vehicle models to curb incentive spending.

OK, now my half-hearted analysis... Cutting 30,000 jobs will increase your unemployment burdens and keep your legal staff busy for YEARS trying to figure out what "rightful termination" is... OH, and your productivity will suffer as well having less people to do the same amount of work, probably raising your cash outlay in overtime and bringing in higher paid consultants. The health care part is a two edged sword, and will employees used to having great coverage stand for it, or will it affect the company? Who knows. Then they are trying to "stimulate" sales with cutting their prices and reducing their profit margins. Sounds like it makes sense to me. *sigh*

In summary (finally) I think we as consumers should hold GM (as well as the other domestic auto manufacturers accountable for their fiscal irresponsibility. Get executives into GM who are hungry and base their salaries on performance, not entitlement. We complain about how the unions have ruined the auto industry, but why do we NOT hold the same companies executives accountable for poor strategy, marginal marketing and poor products. After all... Who wants to buy an ugly, shoddily built car for a ugly, shoddily built and run company?

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

In Other News

Harry Belafonte, Ed Asner and Danny Glover also commended the human rights work of Kim Jong-il. Saying to an already enthralled audience "I cannot believe the Bush administration can get things SO UNBELIEVABLY WRONG, about Jong-Il." When later asked "what they had been smoking?", the three washed-up celebs declined comment.

We have another winner....

Harry Belafonte and Danny Glover are at it again in a star-studded asshat adventure "DAY-OLD." It's a rousing comedy about two washed up performers use their broken down soap-boxes to spread treasonous slander against our elected leaders!,2933,181030,00.html

If only stupid were painful.

"Turkey Tries to Contain Bird Flu Outbreak",2933,181170,00.html

What a great headline is this?